Jokes for kids: 90 of them, sorted by age

Last verified: September 2026

Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? She’ll let it go.

If that got a laugh from your child, you’ve got a six to eight-year-old and you should start there. If it got a laugh out of you, then congrats, we both have the same humor as a child and you will enjoy this jokes for kids page as much as us! A blank stare from your kid means go to the three to fives jokes. A blank stare from you, how does it feel to be a mature adult?

A groan means you’re raising a nine-year-old and the back half of this list is yours. Ninety jokes, sorted that way, because the one that killed in June gets a blank stare in August.

The only trick worth knowing is to stop before the punchline and let them guess. A kid who guesses wrong laughs harder than a kid who was told.

Jokes for kids: Ages 3 to 5

The silliness is the funny part, not the wordplay. This is also the age where a twenty-minute queue feels like an hour, so these earn their keep at an indoor playground more than anywhere else. A cow saying something a cow wouldn’t say is enough.

1. What sound do you hear when a cow breaks the sound barrier? Cow-boom.
2. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? He was already stuffed.
3. What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore.
4. Where do cows go on a night out? The moo-vies.
5. What’s a frog’s favorite drink? Croak-a-cola.
6. Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well.
7. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
8. What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck.
9. Why did the cookie go to the nurse? It felt crummy.
10. What do you call a duck that gets all As? A wise quacker.
11. Why do bees have sticky hair? They use honeycombs.
12. What’s a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
13. What did the little corn say to the big corn? Hi, Pop.
14. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two tired.
15. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
17. Why did the orange stop halfway up the hill? It ran out of juice.
18. What does a cloud wear under its coat? Thunderwear.
19. Why did the mushroom get invited everywhere? He was a fun guy.
20. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.

Jokes for kids: Ages 6 to 8

Around six they work out that one word can mean two things, and it’s the funniest discovery of their life so far. This is where puns start paying off.

21. Why was the math book sad? Too many problems.
22. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
23. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? She’ll let it go.
24. What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner.
25. Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
26. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
27. What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
28. Why do seagulls fly over the sea? If they flew over the bay they’d be bagels.
29. What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing. It waved.
30. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
31. What kind of shoes do robbers wear? Sneakers.
32. Why is Peter Pan always flying? He neverlands.
33. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
34. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies.
35. Why do we tell actors to break a leg? Every play has a cast.
36. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
37. Why did the picture go to jail? It was framed.
38. What has ears but can’t hear? A cornfield.
39. What’s an astronaut’s favorite part of a computer? The space bar.
40. Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing.
41. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
42. How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.
43. What do you call a snowman in July? A puddle.
44. Why are ghosts bad liars? You can see right through them.
45. What’s a computer’s favorite snack? Microchips.

Where these actually get told

Not at the kitchen table. In the ten minutes before something starts: the line to get in, the walk between rooms, the parking lot before anyone’s out of their seat. A ticket line at the zoo, the wait for a table, the slow shuffle into an aquarium on a Saturday.

So if you’ve run out of jokes, you’ve probably also run out of places to be. There are Dallas, Houston, Atlanta and Phoenix lists if you want to start from a city. Find somewhere near you and you’ll have both problems solved.

Jokes for kids: Ages 9 to 12

The pun alone gets an eye roll now, which is its own reward. What works is a joke with a turn in it. These also survive being retold to a friend, which is the real test at this age.

46. I told my friend ten jokes to make him laugh. Sadly, no pun in ten did.
47. What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
48. Why do melons have big weddings? Because they cantaloupe.
49. I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
50. What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for school? Bison.
51. Why can’t you trust an atom? They make up everything.
52. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
53. What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Let out a little wine.
54. Why did the scientist take out his doorbell? He wanted the no-bell prize.
55. Parallel lines have so much in common. Shame they’ll never meet.
56. What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room? The living room.
57. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
58. A bear walks into a restaurant and says, I’d like a grilled… cheese. The waiter says, why the big pause? The bear says, I was born with them.
59. What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.
60. Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.
61. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
62. I’d tell you a joke about an elevator, but it works on too many levels.
63. What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One’s really heavy, the other’s a little lighter.
64. Why did the invisible man turn down the job? He couldn’t see himself doing it.
65. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.

Knock knock

The classic school yard jokes. an oldie but a goodie.The rhythm does the work. Don’t rush it.

66. Knock knock. Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it’s cold out here.
67. Knock knock. Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? No need to cry, it’s only a joke.
68. Knock knock. Who’s there? Tank. Tank who? You’re welcome.
69. Knock knock. Who’s there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, a cow says moo.
70. Knock knock. Who’s there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting c… MOO.
71. Knock knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive right next door.
72. Knock knock. Who’s there? Nobel. Nobel who? No bell, that’s why I knocked.
73. Knock knock. Who’s there? Needle. Needle who? Needle little help getting in.
74. Knock knock. Who’s there? Wooden shoe. Wooden shoe who? Wooden shoe like another one.
75. Knock knock. Who’s there? Alpaca. Alpaca who? Alpaca the suitcase, you pack the car.

School

76. Why did the kid eat his homework? The teacher said it was a piece of cake.
77. What’s a teacher’s favorite nation? Expla-nation.
78. Why was the report card wet? It was below C level.
79. What did the pencil say to the paper? You’re looking sharp.
80. Why did the clock get sent to the principal? It was tocking too much.
81. What building has the most stories? The library.
82. Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
83. What’s the king of all school supplies? The ruler.
84. Why was six afraid of seven? Seven ate nine.
85. What did the paper say to the pencil? Write on.

In the car

Short setups. Nobody wants a long joke in traffic.

86. What do you call a train carrying bubblegum? A chew chew train.
87. Why did the car get a flat tire? There was a fork in the road.
88. What kind of car does a sheep drive? A lamb-orghini.
89. Why do bees never get stuck in traffic? They use the buzz lane.
90. Are we there yet. No. That’s the joke.

Questions

What are good jokes for a 5 year old?

Sound and silliness, not wordplay. At five most kids haven’t worked out that one word can carry two meanings, so a pun doesn’t register. Start at number 1.

When do kids start getting puns?

Around six. By seven or eight it’s their favorite kind of joke, which is why the middle list is the longest.

Why does my kid laugh at jokes that make no sense?

At three and four the shape of a joke is the funny part, not the content. They know it’s a question with a surprise at the end and they’re practicing. Laugh along.

What if the joke doesn’t land?

Go to the next one. Don’t explain it. Explaining teaches a kid that jokes are something you can fail at.

Where are the “Dad” Jokes?

While Dad jokes usually get big laughs, or big eye rolls from the older kids, we thought these were left best to the professionals. Those witty Moms and Dads whose peak humor could never be matched or copied on a page like this. We would never take away the pure technique and skill it takes to pull off such a joke.

So we build this page to be like a factory that makes OK products. Satisfactory…

I’ll see myself out…